“I first joined MyMTâą in Spring 2021 when by age, I should have been post-menopausal, but because of a combination of a polyp and the HRT I was on, I was still getting regular bleeds.
By then I had been struggling for several years. Like Wendy, I was part way through my doctoral studies when the full force of menopause issues hit me. I had long been dreading it as I had seen its effects on my Mum and much older sister, but I was heavily into denial.
I’ve never been a good sleeper but it became awful – 2 or 3 hours a night, so I had low or no energy, and felt irritable and low. The hot flushes I could cope with – I didn’t have them badly, but the night sweats were something else.
And every evening I would ache in my hip joints so badly, and get restless legs, so I was cavorting on the floor trying to get comfortable.
But the worst thing of all for me was what it did to my brain – I couldn’t think straight, couldn’t remember words (and that had always been my strength), couldn’t retain information. Not helpful when you’re trying to study!
Brain fog just didn’t do it justice. Not only had my sense of humour disappeared, I felt like my whole personality had changed and I didn’t like what I was left with. Furthermore, all the doctors seemed interested in was the wretched flushes, and there was little or no sympathy from most of them about my sensitivity to certain HRTs – I must have tried sixteen different types of pill, patch, spray before narrowing it down to two that helped (but neither were perfect). I began to wonder if I was going mad.
I can’t even remember where I first saw Wendy’s course advertised, but I sat down to watch the introductory video and was just so delighted to find that I wasn’t alone. That there was a community who had experienced things as badly or worse than I had, but had a positive attitude towards finding solutions.
Part of the problem is how few of my friends shared the same issues, for most it was a few tough months then better. I had one who recommended HRT to me, but that flicked the switch for her, whereas it was only a partial help for me, so I felt very isolated.
The first thing that happened was I stopped getting up in the night to go to the loo – I’d been going two or three times most nights, so I was stunned that breaking this habit only took a few nights.
It was a small win but it built my confidence in MyMT’s systems, and began to help my sleep. Eating earlier, following Wendy’s hot flush management routine, and doing some night yoga helped more, and when I was lying awake I took to listening to meditations which focus on breathing. Miraculously I found myself sleeping better than I had for decades.
This became SO important because just as I was working my way through the first months on the programme, my husband was rapidly becoming seriously ill. What we had thought was just exhaustion from overwork clearly became something else, and by the end of August 2021 he was hospitalised for what became a 7-month stay fully bed-bound as he was finally diagnosed with a form of non-Hodgkins Lymphoma, and began treatment.
It took so long to diagnose the right strain, that he was too ill to cope with full chemotherapy initially, and there were two nights over the next few months when he was rushed into intensive care and I was told to say my goodbyes. You wouldn’t think you’d sleep a wink under those circumstances, but I kept up with my routine and slept for several hours.
Fortunately, he began to recover and nearly two years on, no one would know that he’d been ill. What meant most to me was that he was out of hospital by March 2022 and able to accompany me to my Covid-delayed graduation the following month – something that had seemed impossible when I had to book the place five months earlier!
The other element that has been important to me was learning to exercise. I’ve always hated exercise and found most forms of it boring, but I also realised that this was contributing to all the aches and pains I was feeling. I have a dog so had always walked a couple of times a day, but now most mornings I make time for a short session – I loved the Rebuild My Fitness programme and the gentle aerobics videos by New Zealand Exercise Instructor, Darryl Goad and his gentle humour. I’ve even bought a set of 2 kg weights (after borrowing my children’s 1kg starter weights) and use them regularly.
I do feel like most of the time I have got ‘myself’ back – sleep is key, of course, but so is diet and the timing of when you eat. I’m not a great fan of either sweet potatoes (kumara to you Antipodeans!) or beetroot, but I have to acknowledge the difference they make to me so do try and include them in my diet, and when I forget, I know about it!
I’m sure we all take different things from MyMTâą, depending on our own unique make-up and experience.
I am just so grateful that I had something to cling to through dark times, and a community that was supportive and helpful and positive. And I cannot thank Wendy enough for making this her specialism and doing such great things to research and publicise natural ways of getting through this challenging period, through sleep routines, dietary changes and exercise.
Over the same period thanks to celebrities raising its profile, a whole industry has burgeoned around menopause, much of which is neither natural nor helpful, purely profitable. I honestly don’t know how I’d have coped over the last few years without MyMTâą – I recommend it to anyone who tells me that they’re struggling with menopause, including my HRT Consultant!
Wendy, Kent, UK
